Wednesday 3 April 2013

A New Beginning ~in the middle of turmoil

Today, April 3, 2013 marks the day that I am making a public decision. I will be spending the month of April in my own HEALING REHABILITATION, for me and for my family. I will post how this journey goes for us, the ups and the downs because it will be an emotional journey of letting go and an emotional journey of a new beginning. Today we will start with two things. The first thing is the decision: I am, and have been, enabling my son, although I tried very hard to stop this enabling behavior, my intense and undying love for him has made it impossible for me to control. How will I make this stop, now, at this point? I have made a realization that my "helping" him is really only hurting him, and everyone else I love. I am slowly losing everything, including myself. I am making a decision that I WILL NO LONGER allow his addiction to control my life. I am going to get back in the driver's seat, TODAY. Does this mean I love my son any less? NO. It means that because I do love him, I need to let him go, I need to trust that he will find his way back to us, somehow. I need to believe it is possible and hope that he will see his way through the darkness.Our first action:Tonight I will be having a bonfire with my family. We will write about things we need to let go: our expectations, let downs and heartbreaks and we will burn them all in a symbolic fire for a new beginning. We will also have a candle lighting ceremony, we will light a candle and say a prayer asking God to show Kyle the way home, we will keep that candle lit all month, maybe longer. TODAY




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2 comments:

  1. Unknown3 April 2013 at 21:19

    My heart goes out to you Trish. I wish you the best as you let go and let God.

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  2. Anonymous3 April 2013 at 22:00

    Trish, my prayers for you and your family are forth coming. I don't have children of my own, but my nephew has lost his way as well, and my sister had made the same choice you have. Like I told her, it doesn't mean your not a GOOD parent, nor that you don't love him, it means that your needing HIM to finally make a choice on his OWN to stop hurting himself. Just keep tight hold on the "ROPE of "HOPE", the lord has his Plan & Journey all ready for him. Stay strong, Hugs,Love, and Blessings, *Catherine Lyon*

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