A beautiful boy

When my son is sober, he is amazing! I wish he could see that, I wish he could see how amazing he is when he isn't on drugs. We spent the day together, no confrontations, no hostility, no anger, no guilt or shame. We spent the day with my beautiful boy. Oh how I have missed him. How we have all missed him so much. I know he doesn't see it, he doesn't get it. It's scary, spending time with that boy we love so much, for now, while he is safe, I know that boy is here to stay, at least for awhile, I want to enjoy it as much as I can, I want to savor it, hold onto it with all my might and never let it go. I know I can't do that and for now, with my new-found acceptance, I will enjoy every single minute that I get to share with my beautiful, sober son. As a parent of an addict, we just never know how many beautiful moments we get.

For all you parents out there who would like to read a good book, Beautiful Boy by David Sheff, a book written by a dad about his addict son. His son Nick Sheff also wrote his memoir Tweak, these two books really opened my eyes to a parents view and then reading the memoirs of the son, interesting to see the two perspectives. I recommend reading Beautiful Boy first.